Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Tuesday update-- inching forward but not there yet=dam



this photo was taken outside of the Midnight Mission on 6th St. between San Pedro St and San Julian St.

------------
5:00PM
Hot off of the Press-----three counselors at a rehab center have been fired within the last 24 hours for testing dirty. Wow. I talked to two of the people recently. I did not talk to them long. I am beyond making judgements about a person's capability to stay clean and on the right path. I just know that it is unfortunate for them and their families.

I just wonder why. I watched one of these men go through alot. I guess he was not ready. I tell men that I have met. If you are not 200 percent sure you are ready to live a different life, do not accept a position. The fact is they represent those that will follow them.

It is true that outside of this blogging readership, and outside of my circle of friends, employers do not know of my past history. I am beyond hiding it however. I feel strongly that what I do will play a part in what an employer will decide if someone else wants to work for them who is rebuilding their life from whatever problem has come his way. That is why I am very patient in doing the right things and making sure I give every step 200percent in the fundamentals. I know how to cut corners. Now is not the time to do that.

One of my best friends told me to send him the outline of my resume. He would do it. He knows my background damn near better than I do. Indeed he is a very good writer and he is an employer. However, I declined the offer. I told him that I needed to do this myself. I would send him the finished product and have him critique it but there is something very therapeutic, in many ways, happening to me while I go through this process. I am tackling some issues that are surfacing that have been tied to this process over the years. I am dealing with those issues. Each step in this rebuilding process has issues.

Sure it can be frustrating and I feel that time is getting the best of me at times, but it is more important to be prudent and make sure I have answered every question about myself that I know and all of the possible ones that can come up that I do not know about prior to discovering them from going through the process. It is very important that I not do things in haste. Yes, when I see people working and progressing I feel left behind at times. I just have to be patient and endure the time it takes for me to be everything I view myself as being and feel myself to be able to be. After I go through the process, whatever process it is and I am confident that I can do things with dispatch and recognize things with dispatch then I will cut corners. Not now. I took this long, I can wait a day or two.

Unfortunately, those that were fired did not do what was necessary for them to maintain the course. It took years for me. It took years of fighting and studying.
I wrote and monitored. I monitored and wrote. I wanted to work during that time but I was determined to put first things first. No one except my mother knew what I was doing. I am paying the price for that silence, in the short term. However, in the long term, my healthy lifestyle will be built on solid foundation.

I would like an employer who reads this to say,"Hey, this man put himself on the line to help himself and others. He is sharing what it takes to sustain a healthy life style and positive self image. He endured the test of time and was willing to perservere even when it hurt. I believe he deserves a chance."

One firm hired me just for that reason. SRO HOUSING. They said I deserved the chance. I proved to them that I was rebuilding my life in a determined and steadfast fashion. It was not there fault that I had a hernia. I still maintain good relationships with people of that firm.

It is clear I have experience in many areas and can transfer that experience to whatever industry I happen to get an opportunity. I have seen so many not hang in there. I have so many move so fast and then crash and burn. I have seen a healthy amount do what I am doing and one by one they are given the green light to advance in their chosen career path.

I wanted to change my blog. It is fine the way it is. I write what I write when I write it. If I want to develop a niche blog that will pay money, I can start another one. I do not have to change this one. It serves a purpose. It reminds me of many things and it sends a message out to those who are climbing back. Do not put yourself in a position where you will cost yourself in the long run. Be true to yourself. Know yourself. Know what you need to do for yourself and for your family.
Rebuilding your life is a serious journey. Take care of the fundamentals. Do not avoid them. That is when you do things to distract you. Do not avoid fundamentals in order to expedite progress. Stick to them. Embrace the fundamentals. Take those small, baby steps. They will get bigger. They stride will lenghten itself gradually and naturally.

I am glad that the program did what they had to do to protect the integrity of its program. I hope others do the same thing. They are not the only counselors who are "dirty" on Skid Row. Keep your program pure. It will help in increasing the chances of future success stories. I was just going to do a brief statement and look what I did. I wrote another long winded passage (smile)

------

Tonight there is a Downtown Los Angeles Neignborhood Council meeting at the
Los Angeles Theater on Broadway. It will start at about 6PM,

-------

On Friday The STRIVE Program on Crocker Street will have its graduating ceremonies this week. They will be at the Grove mall on 3rd Street. Certificate ceremonies will be given out as well for those who have finished a phase of the program. Those ceremonies will be at the Transition house courtyard on Crocker St.
Please come out and show your support for the program. It is an outstanding program.
-------

As for me, the day was filled with progress, though slow in coming. No, I have not blitzed the market. I had some last minute editing and that was followed by technical glitches.

These last few yards are getting on my nerves. I discovered that when things were getting to me, I found it easy to distract myself by talking on the phone or going to the store to get something that I did not need. Finally, I sat in the room, pulled out a legal pad and went to work.

The nice lady at Chrysalis, with whom I have been working, went through my letter with a fine tooth comb. Tomorrow we will deal with the resume. All of the work I did on the computer, yesterday, was not saved as it said it was on the computer.
Obstacles. There is always something that gets in the way. The obstacles come in ways that one would never expect. The key thing is to not let those things get to you. Therefore I had to do all of the work over again. It was much easier because
I already fought through the creative and organizational design blocks.

I have seen that something as simple as a computer failure that erases work can drive someone in this environment to snap. They lose perspective and self distruct.

That will not happen to me.

talk tomorrow

No comments: