Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Bill on the missons. He believes in them


On my previous blog, the picture did not show through on the computer.

I am glad it did not now. I am tired of posting sad, dreary stuff. I am glad I have these balloons. I used to buy hundreds of balloons and blow them up when I was a kid. many times I would feel them with water and throw them at cars as they passed by or at people.

To show y ou how much I enjoyed living a clean american boy life when I was training for the triathlon, I bought balloons , blew them up and studied science with them--static electricity.

air currents and things like that. I was doing that while my sister thought I was doing God knows what. I was even studying how to write a screen play from a book that she bought me.

I told her that some day I may win the Pulitzer Prize. She told authorities I said I won the Pulitzer prize. I was just trying to t ell her I was going to make her proud of me some day. Because of her resentments, she heard something else that fed further her resentments.


I am glad these balloons are up because balloons were up on the Union Rescure Mission Thanksgiving day celebration last week. These balloons were from that day. I shot balloons of this day.

A man from my neighborhood told me a week ago that I need to keep writing. He landed down here and is in a program at the Midnight Mission. He does not like some of the things the mission does but he believes they are sincere in helping people. He feels they have their own philosophy. He feels each of the missions has their own way of doing things. He had this to say.

"Walter, you keep writing. You are writing about what people want to hear. I know you are hurting but you can do some good. First of all, these people out here should be held responsible for the food, not the missions. Next thing is this. YOu know that I smoked alot of dope. You know I do not lie. Anyone that tells you they are starving on Skid Row is lying. If they say they need money to buy food, they are lying. There is too much food on Skid Row for anyone to be starving. So when anyone is pan handling for money, they are doing so because they want to buy crack or heroine. Mostly crack. Crack smokers down here spend their energy lying.

Heroine users spend their energy either working to get the drug or working to get it. It may be burglary but they are working because , Physically, they know they need it and they do not have the time to waste begging.

Next. I think the missions do a good job. They try. They need to keep more informed with some things but they are down here. They really need to learn how to work together. If they learn how to work together instead of competing they could get alot more done. Write that. make sure you write that. Give me that camera so I can record it because you need help.

(smile}. buy me an ice cream sandwich."

"I thought you said you can eat anytime?" I kidded him.

"Walter, stop playing with me. you know what I mean. Write what I am telling you. The missions are not bad people. they need help. They need advice. Write and maybe it will help them seek advice. look at the volunteers. Dont they look like they are putting their hearts into it?"
They did. The volunteers were putting their hearts into everything they did. They evern gave massages.
"walter, skid row is many different t hings. Now one has the answer because there is not just one problems. There are many problems wrapped up in a ball like a hard baseball beneath the cover. Most people just see the cover. However , they need to unravel the balled string to see what makes the ball. walter, you are my homeboy. I watched you grow up.. You can tell these peoples out here what is going on. That is why you went to wheres you went to school.
I do not care if you have money or not. THIS IS YOUR JOB. TELL PEOPLE WHAT THEY WANT TO KNOW. YOU WILL BE FINE. BUT TELL THE WORLD WHAT YOU SEE. IT CAN CHANGE EVERY SECOND AND EVERYDAY. THAT IS OK. YOU SEE MORE. YOU SEE SO MUCH IT CONFUSES YOU. Just be patient. It will come. you can write. you can commjunicate because you have been in the company of every type of person that is down here. You are the only person I have ever met who is like that. We laughed at you when you were growing up when you wore those swim suits and tennis togs. But you could also play basketball as good or better than anyone else. so we asked ourselves why is he wearing tennis clothes.
we found out when you were trying to tell us to stop selling cocaine. when you were telling us we know already through practical experience the things they were t eaching you in college. We did not know that. you had to experience that world so you could tell us we were not stupid.
That is your job then. that is your job now. tell them. Find it in you to tell A about B and B about A. You can do it. You were raised to do this. now get to work. keep writing.
Last thing about these missions. people do not understand themselves. The missions are made up of people. These same people try to understand themselves just like everyone else. How are they suppose to come up with all of the answers. Push them walter. push them to talk to each other. Push them like you did us.
WALTER, YOU taught us to not hate white people when we were growing up. you taught us that they were the same as us. we did not believe you. We argued with you. you argued back. your swimming in those suits taught you how to go the distance and endure us and you convinced us. We got tired before you did. you and the truth outlasted us. You can outlast this hurt you feel. it is the same. You can help those people find the truth. do it. " gOD, GIVE ME THE STRENGTH TO ENDURE. give me the strength to perservere so many th ings so I can do something. My mother would expect me to try to help even if I am in so much pain.
I cried the whole time he said those nice things about me. I hope I can make a difference.

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